Day 3!

Rhonna posted a Marianne Williamson quote today!

"joy is what happens to us when we allow ourselves to recognize how good things really are."

wow...

so true. just thinking about what is good in my life, regardless of the tough times, does bring joy. the tough times even have a way of bringing out the good in my life. The good things come into focus.

Joy.

I love that feeling.

I have an anxiety disorder. Not the exciting, normal anxiety that we all experience when things are different. But anxiety that requires a lot of self talk, deep breathing, and occasional Xanax... But... I weaned myself off of Xanax completely about 5 months ago, I think. I had been taking 10mg daily, plus 5-10mg more when needed (in extra stressful situations - outside of the norm).

Anyway, I'm proud of me. I took Xanax to get me through the toughest period. I was at the point where I wasn't strong enough mentally or emotionally to support myself through that time. But I've strengthened myself over the last year and gotten myself to where I can recognize when things are getting bad, and I can practice some relaxation techniques. Sometimes I just know that I have to give myself some space, time away from the outside world. And that's ok. So far I've been able to do a lot of things through some terrible panic attacks. Yeah, me! =)

I guess I just needed to remind myself of that. Sometimes the anxiety just sneaks up on me. And the worst part is, is blocks me from seeing the things that bring me joy! But my 21-Day Challenge again comes into play here. Enjoy the journey. Hey - the word joy is part of enjoy! ha! =)

Well, today was a big day. Lots of anxiety, but I've survived!!! =) This morning Kevin and Lisa and I went to Columbia to meet up with a co-worker of Kevin's. He is a pilot and has a twin-engine four-seater plane and wanted to take us flying. It was pretty scary, but I relaxed after a few minutes in the air. However, after about 45 minutes, I started to feel PRETTY motion sick. Between the pressure on my head from the headphones, the heat, and the circles we were making, I finally had it. I guess one of the others saw the green look of my skin. The pilot asked if I needed to go back. I figured that I didn't want to ruin it for everyone else, so I was just going to wait until I couldn't take it any more. But thankfully they were all ok with going back at that point. =) So, now it's about 10 hours later and I'm finally starting to feel less nauseous. It was fun, but I think I've had my fill of small planes. =)

Lisa and I went to the pool for a couple of hours. I think that I may be able to practice swimming here. There are only about 40 houses in this subdivision, so the pool is never busy. I'm guessing during the week it will be pretty bare over there!!! So, we'll see what happens. If nothing else, I can work on my tan. =)

After the pool, we showered off and ran some errands. Cool material thing of the day - Lisa had to stop at SteinMart. I think that was my first time in one of those stores. I was expecting a TJMaxx feel, but it was much more dept store, much less garage sale. But still good price. I found a skirt on clearance that I figured would ring up around $25. It was very pretty, and originally $80. $25 would be a great deal, so why not? Well, it ended up being $8something!!! I couldn't believe it. It was 50% off of the $25, and 15% more off because of some red dot sale! Wow. It's gorgeous. I can't wait to wear it somewhere and feel pretty!!!

Joy!!!